Christmas

I am super big on DIY presents for Christmas, a penchant born out of necessity rather than preference. Because there are a lot of people in my family and I am usually too broke to buy them actual presents. Over the years I have made necklaces out of felt and coloured paper, felt animal pen holders, tea bags, etc etc.

My most favourite of them all is the portraits I painted of my family. Unfortunately, everyone turned out looking really scary and nobody wanted to hang these on their walls so now my mum keeps them in a basket under a bunch of stuff to reduce the frequency that they are seen. I myself found them to be awful but the thing with DIY is that once you commit your time, energy, and pocket money to paint and canvas, there is no turning back.

LOL.

The holidays have long been a source of stress for me. My tendency to grossly underestimate the time taken to make these presents also adds to the chaos. I didn't have time to paint my sister's family portrait and when they saw the other portraits, politely told me "it's okay!"

Anyway, since I've been working and saving a little, I thought this year I'd actually go to the shops and buy proper presents like a normal person does. Until one day in late October, when Scott and I were in a Uniqlo standing in front of a bargain bin filled with white jeans, he came up with the most brilliant plan.

Being the sucker that I am for DIY stuff, I was immediately like, "YASSSS!" (We both had no idea what we'd just sign up for.) In the weeks leading up to Christmas, we converted Scott's dining and living area into Santa's workshop - tinsel, bells, paint, PANTS all over the place.

I highly recommend everyone in 'serious courtship' to undertake a long and tedious project together to discover the ways in which you complement and/or get in each others way when life gets long and tedious.

Project Christmas Pants required us to be innovative and smart about making it happen. Scott tends to be very chill, good at lightening the mood and getting stuff done while I stress about perfecting things. In the beginning, I would spend 1 hour sewing 8 bells around the hem and then 6 hours shading dinosaurs on Quinn's pants. In that same time, Scott would have done a dance, painted 5 pairs of pants, made dinner, and changed the bedsheets. At the end of the day, I usually get frustrated at having done so little and taking such a long time to do everything so Scott would have to give me a hug and pep talk. Then we'd eat cake and fall asleep while watching How To Get Away With Murder.

Anyway, happy holidays to all. May the new year be filled with more love and laughter.

Ps- these are the same white jeans we used for Halloween. We planned our Halloween costume around "white jeans" because we had 15 pairs sitting in Scott's cupboard. Who knew white jeans would come in so handy?

Boracay

A couple of weeks back, Scott and I went to Boracay and were reminded just how therapeutic it is to hang out by the beach and do absolutely nothing. Our days were blissfully unscheduled and relaxing, although getting to the island was very tiring and a little bit of a hassle. 

The whole journey took us a good seven hours and involved a plane, a speedboat, and some travelling by road. Fortunately, our airbnb host recommended an excellent service provider, Southwest, which was very well co-ordinated and took us door-to-door. We booked our transfer online before the trip and I felt a bit cheated initially because as we were walking out of the airport I saw a lot of people holding up cardboards advertising their services for one tenth of what we had paid. But when we finally arrived at our apartment that evening, I was thoroughly impressed and satisfied with how swiftly we were herded from bus to boat to bus with minimal waiting time in between.

We stayed on Bulabog Beach - Scott calls it 'Ball Bag Beach' - which is a 15-minute walk from the main tourist area and less busy but still very lively as it is a popular spot for kitesurfing. We could only access our apartment from the beach so when the tide came right up in the evenings, we had to climb over our neighbour's hedges and were barked at very fiercely by their guard dogs.

Each morning we'd watch the kite surfers while eating breakfast and then head to White Beach for the afternoon. I usually come up with excuses to avoid going into the sea - sea water allergy, period, can't swim - but could not resist in Boracay. It was so shallow and clear, it felt unreal. Around mid-afternoon we'd get a massage and then buy some fruit, bread, and eggs on the way home.

There's not a lot of local culture in Boracay and most of the island seems catered to tourists. (Lots of Koreans!) Food is not great. We could not find decent calamari even though it seemed to be on the menu everywhere. We figured they were all using the same calamari supplier and after I asked "Oh! They have calamari too!!! Do you think it will be nice here?" one too many times, Scott made me promise to stop ordering it as we were only setting ourselves up for disappointment. 

Luckily we found one place that had good food. I can't remember what it's called anymore, so just look out for a spanish place that serves churros. We went there everyday and tried their churros, tacos, and olive pizzetta - all delicious.

We went to d'Talipapa market one night because Scott wanted to get his seafood fix. Quite fun because you can buy your own seafood from the market and then have them cook it for you in one of the small restaurants next door. They tried to rip us off but Scott is a master when it comes to the art of negotiation so in the end I think we got an all right deal. The trick is to not bring out too much cash with you so don't give in. Because you cannot afford to. (Note: their butter tastes weird. I think they use margarine.)

Anyway, the highlight of our trip for me was when we made the impromptu decision to go helmet diving and parasailing one afternoon even though Scott doesn't particularly like being high up and I'm scared of everything. It all happened so fast, we had no chance to talk ourselves out of it. One minute we were lazing on the beach while Scott playfully entertained a couple of guys who approached us with a laminated card showcasing the various water sports they offered and the next minute we were riding in a speedboat out to the diving platform. (It was so organized!!)

Since Sri Lanka, we've gone through a range of experiences that lend themselves to compatibility. Helmet diving and parasailing let us see each other in yet another different context - one where we both a bit nervous and didn't know what to expect. It was a fun way to see how we handle stress - big and small - and respond to the curveballs life sometimes throws.

An Education

Just found this old video of Freja, Molly, and Quinn from 2010. Hahahahahaha good times. Teaching them about the Queen Bey because, duh. Isn't it weird that I hadn't figured out how to rotate videos by the time I was 18 years old? Look at me now - older and better. Yay life!

Japanese Man

Whether it's Halloween or an office dress up party, Scotty always brings his A game!

Flatbread

I had a love-hate relationship with food while growing up. On a good day, I would only eat food that was prepared by myself or my mother. And even then, I always had a lingering suspicion that my mother was putting sugar and other stuff I did not want into my food. Even up till today, I'm notorious for bombarding her with my inquiries over the dinner table. (What's in this? Did you put soya sauce? Is there cornflour in the gravy? Is this a free-range chicken?) On a bad day, I would eat nothing but sweet potato or yam because I was terrified of refined carbs and sugar.

A few weeks back, I had to fill up a questionnaire for our corporate newsletter about healthy eating where I was prompted for some tips or 'rules' to help others sustain a healthy lifestyle. I giggled thinking back on the rules I'd previously subjected myself to: no carbs, no pork for blood type O, the caveman diet, vegetables only, vegetables and eggs only (I love eggs!), vegetables and eggs and tofu only, green tea and 300 kcal per day.

The rules turned eating - a joyful social activity - into a lonely struggle. Eating out became increasingly difficult, so I started eating at home more. And when tension escalated over the dinner table whenever I'd refuse to eat the food my mother had cooked, I ate alone. I wasn't able to abide by these rules for too long because they were extreme. I became lethargic and moody. And whenever I broke a rule, I would berate myself. So weak! No self-control! Disgusting! Not good enough!

It took me a long time to understand that the control I thought I had, I didn't really have. And even after that epiphany, it took an even longer time to get over the fears and re-establish a balanced relationship with food. But when I finally stopped withholding food from myself, I also stopped withholding love from myself and everything became infinitely better.

I'm glad that there are no more rules today, that I don't have to worry about being judged for eating "weird food," that mealtimes are no longer a great exercise in calculating calories, that I can reminisce on my tuberous roots days and laugh.

But if I had one rule - just one - it would be to eat everything in its natural form, nothing from cans or boxes where possible. (Unless you're making spaghetti bolognese. Then always get bottled tomato paste. And frozen peas in a bag - they're good too.) Processed/ready-to-eat food is one fear I haven't been able to rid myself of. And for good reason. 

Even apples that are too big and too red are scary too, because chemical preservatives and genetically-modified food seem unnatural and against the way of the universe. Scott says golden rice is good, though, because it is enriched with beta-carotene and has saved many lives especially the malnourished in the third world. I haven't read enough about it or thought of a good counter-argument, so my battle is currently against luncheon meat, gummy bears (although I loved them as a kid to the point where all my front teeth were rotten because I ate so much of them), crab sticks, canned sodas, and anything else that I can't really make out consists of what.

Just a word of caution about eating eggs out, always order them sunny-side up. Even though I know I'm eating an egg, some food establishments poach their eggs in advance, stick them in the fridge and then reheat them as and when they are required. And don't get me started on scrambled eggs and the possibility of making them from powdered eggs. Basically, trust nobody! Cook your own eggs! Cook your own meals!

Scotty made flatbread for breakfast one weekend

Adding some salt and herbs to our bread

Despite my many words denouncing processed food, we had our flatbread with chorizo and baked beans. Cheeky cheeky. Everything in moderation! Also on the plate is a fried egg and ribbons made from carrot and cucumber.

Even though dairy is not intended in nature to be human food - it is food for baby cow - and the stark fact that Scott is not a baby cow, he loves his milk and drinks it by the carton. We were only a couple of months into our relationship and it wasn't the right time for my inner control freak to shine, so I passively placed a glass of warm water with honey and lemon to his right. He drank both.

Halloween

I spent 2 years drafting and draping in art school to sew Halloween costumes for my sister's children. Yay life! A couple of years ago I made them cloaks because they wanted to dress up as witches and wizards from Harry Potter. This year they asked for vampire capes. I'm lucky they don't ask for anything too complicated!

Scott and Bailey helping with the pattern cutting

Scott modelling the cape

Bailey the vampire dog

Quinn and Lulu testing their capes

We didn't have enough fabric to make 3 capes so Freja went as a pirate. Although Scott offered a clever solution, "just sew 2 more collars on here!"

Scott and I indulging in a bit of the old ultraviolence. Again, dressing up as the guys from A Clockwork Orange was Scott's clever idea. I'd never heard of the film before so Scott put it on before we went to the party to help me get into character. But we stopped watching about 5 minutes in because it made me feel very uneasy.

Mariah as a person with scary makeup, Tat as a 20s lady, Rah as a karate kid, Ame as a Mexican fighter. Nobody knew who we were :(

My cousin Emma saw our pictures and asked, "What the fuck were you guys? ..... Babies?"


My favourite dance partner

I hope everyone did something fun for Halloween too!

Chicken Pie

After a month of dating, Scott lured me to his place with the promise of tuna. Even though I am not a cat, this trick worked. I was very curious about our dinner because when a boy offers to cook you tuna, there's always a chance he is just going to crack open a can of tuna for dinner.

It was only then did I learn that Scott had worked in a kitchen as a teenager. And as I watched him manoeuvre his knife so swiftly – not just any knife, mind you, but his knife he's had for the last decade or so – did I realize that Scott only means serious business when he says he'll cook.

I didn't take a picture of the first dinner he made for us because I was too busy trying to keep my chill. But I was not able to maintain that juvenile pose for long. What's the point of pretending to be neutral, above it, unmoved by it? What's the point of trying to appear disengaged and apathetic? What's the point of imitating a stone or a slab of ham? Since then he's been cooking, and I've been snapping.

Here's a picture of the chicken pies we made some weeks later. He made everything from scratch! We didn't have enough pastry to completely cover both pies hence the rustic latticework.